Romantic Relationships and Conflicts
Conflicts in relationships can be difficult but more times than not, if they are handled well, conflicts can lead to strengthened relationships.
On this page you can find more information about how to avoid and deal with conflicts in romantic relationships.
If you do find yourself in a conflict, here are some ways of dealing with conflicts in romantic relationships in a healthy way:
- Communicate openly and honestly with your partner
- Do not belittle your partner – it’s easy to say something in the heat of the moment or try to blame your partner. Try and focus on your feelings and how their actions have made you feel.
- Try and focus on what the fight is about – Try not to draw every grievance you may have about your partner into one single argument. Stay focused on what the fight is about.
- Actively listen to what your partner is trying to tell you – it is easy to go on the defensive when you feel as though you are being criticised, however try to listen to what your partner is telling you.
- Step Away from the argument –If you feel as though you may say or do something you may regret consider taking a time out from the argument and get a little space for a while to gather your thoughts and feelings.
There are some warning signs of a toxic relationship which can emerge during conflicts, these include:
- Your partner gaslighting you
- They blame you for a problem they caused
- They consistently play the victim in a conflict
How can the University Support you?
If you have concerns that your relationship may be abusive, you can report this to the University online using the Online Incident Reporting Portal. You can find more information about domestic violence here.
If conflicts in your relationship are impacting your Mental Wellbeing, you can receive support from the Mental Wellbeing Team by completing the Mental Wellbeing Referral form.
What to do next?
If you feel that you are in immediate danger in your relationship you can call emergency services on 999 or call campus security on 01509 222141.
Talk to Someone
It might be a good idea to start off by talking to someone who you trust about the conflicts in your relationship. This way you can get someone else’s opinion on what is going on. If you feel like you need further guidance you can reach out to LU Advice to get free and non-judgemental advice and support.
What should I do if I am worried about somebody else?
If you fear that they are in immediate danger you should call emergency services on 999 or campus security on 01509 222141.
If a friend comes to speak to you about a conflict which has occurred in a romantic relationship of theirs, you can always provide a listening ear. If you have concerns that the relationship may be abusive you can support them by:
- Letting them open up to you on their own terms – they may not realise their relationship may be abusive. If you have concerns gently let them know that you will listen to them and encourage them to go and seek support
- Be non-judgemental and respect their decisions
- Remember that you cannot force them to do anything
If you are concerned that a friend may be in an abusive relationship you can contact the University using the Online Incident Reporting Portal.
Last Updated: 4th September 2022