House/Flatmate Conflicts

Normally, when people come to University, this is their first time living away from home and their families meaning that it is most likely their first time experiencing living with other people.

Living with others is an essential part of the University experience. Just like at home, there is the potential for conflicts to arise when you live with others. It is not always possible to avoid conflicts with those who you live with but here are some top tips to minimize the chance of conflicts arising.

Top Tips

  1. Address the issues when they arise – it is better to deal with something early on than to leave it and let it become an even bigger issue. You might find it a bit difficult to address issues, but it will be easier to address them when they are small issues than leaving them to later in the year when the issues have evolved into something bigger.  
  2. Be respectful of your flatmates –you will be meeting a lot of different people from very diverse backgrounds. It is therefore important to be aware of the differences and be respectful of them. For example, you may have flatmates who have different religious beliefs and therefore might not drink or engage in prayers.  
  3. A Tidy Flat is a Happy Flat – No matter what living situation you are in, living in halls or off campus, you will have some communal areas such as kitchens, lounges, and bathrooms. It is very important that you keep these clean. This is not only to reduce the risk of things like fire, but also to keep the flat happy. Cleanliness is one of the most common grounds for conflict. To avoid conflicts on cleanliness, you should tidy and clean after yourself and so should the others. If you feel like a flatmate is not pulling their weight, you should have a quiet word with them about them not doing their bit. If it does not get better after you have talked to them, you can talk to a member of you Hall Warden team if you live in halls or if you live in town, you can call a meeting between all flatmates and try to approach the topic that way.  
  4. Be aware and respectful of each other’s routines –Everyone’s life at Loughborough is a little different, some may study on courses which are more demanding on an individual’s time while others may be part of one of Loughborough many sports team which takes up a lot of time as well. You should think about how your actions impact others.  This is not to say that you should restrict yourself from things, but instead you should be considerate, for example if you are returning from a night out. Small actions go a long way, so be quiet when you get in and you will see that your other flatmates will be respectful of you too when you need them to be.  

How can the University Support you?

If you live in a hall of residence, you can talk to your Hall Warden Team for advice and support regarding conflicts with flatmates. It is the Warden Team that is responsible for pastoral support within the hall.  

If you off-campus, for example living in Loughborough Town, you can speak to the Community Warden Team.  

If the conflict has progressed to a point where you feel like you need to move accommodation or wish to terminate your lease agreement early, the Student Advice and Support Service Team can talk you through the process and implications of this.  

If you are experiencing bullying or harassment by your flatmates, you can receive support from a member of the Mental Wellbeing Team. You can reach out to the team by completing the Online Referral Form. Any information which you include in the form or disclose to a member of the team will be treated sensitively and you will be able to decide what next step works best for you. Further advice on what to do if you are experiencing bullying or harassment is available here. 

What to do next?

Keep a Log

If you are experiencing conflicts with your flatmates, you should keep a log of what has happened. This should include dates, times, a description of what has happened, who it involved and a record of any evidence that you have. This will make it easier for you to be able to recall what has happened accurately and be able to provide anyone you talk to with accurate details. 

If you Live in Halls

If you are living in a hall, you should contact your Hall Warden Team. This can be done by emailing your Warden, calling the Subwarden duty number or talking to a member of the team in person.

If you Live in Town

If you live in the community, you can contact the Community Warden Team, who can provide you with advice and support. 

Advice on Ending your Lease Early

If you want to discuss any implications of ending your lease early, please complete the Online Referral Form.

Harassment or Bullying

If you are experiencing bullying or harassment from your flatmates, please complete the Online Incident Reporting Portal. 

What should I do if I am worried about somebody else?

Provide a listening ear – It is normal for people to complain about flatmates every once in a while, but if they are talking a lot about their experience in the flat and it sounds negative or like they are being bullied, you should encourage them to talk to the Hall Warden/Community Warden Team or file a report on the Online Reporting Portal.  

If you both live in the flat or in the same house, you could try to talk to the other flatmate together. There is strength in numbers and sometimes someone else might have a better connection with the person causing the distress and could potentially make a difference. 

Last Updated: 4th September 2022