Divorce, Separation and Dissolution
Whilst you’re studying at Loughborough you or a member of your family may decide to get a divorce or separate. Whenever this happened and regardless of whether you were expecting it, it can still come as a shock.
Every person’s reason for choosing to get divorced or to separate is different. Some parents may decide to stay together until their child is at university before they choose to go separate ways.
If you or someone in your family is currently going through a divorce, you may feel overwhelmed and scared. Below you can find some helpful tips on how to deal with divorce or separation and how the University can help you.
Advice for you if you are going through a separation or divorce
If you are going through a separation or a divorce it is important that you take the time that you need to process what has happened/what is happening. It is common to experience feelings of grief or loss for the end of your relationship. Going through a separation or divorce can also lead to feelings on anxiety as you are starting a new chapter in your life.
It is also encouraged to talk to someone if you are going through a separation or a divorce. Sometimes talking to someone can help you process what is going on and provide you with tools on how to deal with the current situation.
Advice for if your parents are separating or divorcing
If your parents are separating or divorcing, this can be very difficult for you, no matter if it was expected or not. In some cases, however it might feel like a relief for you as it might be the best solution for everyone involved.
Either way it is very common to experience feelings of sadness or even loss. You may also feel worried about what is going to happen next and how things will turn out. Just remember that feelings like these are normal, however, it might be beneficial to talk to someone about your parents' separation and divorce. Talking to someone can help you to better understand the situation and come to terms with what is happening.
How can the University Support you?
If you feel like your or your parents' separation or divorce is affecting your mental wellbeing, you can contact the Mental Wellbeing team by filling out the Wellbeing Referral Form.
You can talk to your academic tutor if you feel like the divorce or separation has affected your studies, they can then advise you on what can be done.
If the divorce or separation has affected your financial situation or your living situation, you can get advice from the Student Advice and Support Service by using the Online Referral Form.
What to do next?
Contact Wellbeing Team
Contact the Mental Wellbeing team if you feel like the divorce or separation has affected your mental wellbeing using the Online Referral Form.
Get Advice from Student Advice and Support Service
If the divorce or separation has affected your financial situation or your living situation, you can get advice from the Student Advice and Support Service by using the Online Referral Form.
Contact your Academic Tutor
You can talk to your academic tutor if you feel like the divorce or separation has affected your studies, they can then advise you on what can be done.
Submit a Mitigating Circumstances Claim
If you feel that your studies have been impacted by the separation or divorce you can submit a mitigating circumstances claim. More information can be found in the Student Handbook.
What should I do if I am worried about somebody else?
If you think that someone is or could be harming themselves or others you and it is an emergency, you should call 999 for emergency services or you can call campus security on 0800 526966.
If it is a non-emergency but you are still worried you can call the subwarden duty number if you live in halls or call campus security using 01509 222141.
If you are worried about someone else who is going through a divorce or separation or someone whose parents are separating or divorcing, you should start off by offering to listen and talk to them. Remember that sometimes it is more important for you to listen than to offer any advice. Ensure that you do not:
- Minimise someone's feelings
- Tell them to focus on the positives
- Tell them to not worry and that it will be alright, in most cases a separation or divorce means a whole lot of newness which can be very worrying to someone
- Tell them to get over it
If you are worried that the separation or divorce is impacting someone largely you should encourage them to reach out and talk to someone about it, this could be a member of the Mental Wellbeing team or a warden/subwarden or anyone else they trust.
External Resources
Last Updated: 5th September 2022